5 reasons (not) to have children

Lately I caught myself thinking about having a child. When I asked myself why, and tried to answer consciously, I had to admit that it’s because I’ve lost purpose in life.

I don’t know what to do, I have no goal, no mission and uncertainty of the world is really getting to me lately.

And you know what? I think that is a terrible reason to have a child.

When I look around at my peers who decide to have a kid, I keep wondering (and directly asking some of them) what is the reason for that, their answers seem blurry (except accidents 🙈).

“It’s time.”; “I want to raise a human of my own.”; “I always wanted a child.”; “I want a family.”; “I want someone to love.”

All of them are… selfish. And I’m not judging, I do a lot of selfish thing all the time. My wanting to have a child came from the same reasons. I just share the observations.

On the other hand, there are many reasons not to have kids, and they are more rational. Here, the expected 5:

  1. Climate change
  2. Your child won’t be as amazing and perfect as you with it was
  3. You will cause the kid a lot of trauma no matter how hard you try
  4. You can have all this money for leisure and doing fun things
  5. You can spend this time and energy on developing yourself and/or saving the world

So here it is. Truth is revealed, but I know that this changes nothing. Our biological urges to procreate and pass our genes to other generations are stronger then any argument ever made. Because body&emotions > mind.

I am also very well aware that it is not my place to tell anyone whether they should have kids or not, I just want some of you to consider it deeply and then make a decision instead of going all in, because “that’s the way it is”.

Photo from Unsplash — author Jonathan Borba

Works in Tech 💻 into art, culture and psychology. IG & Quora @alaisontime